• Introduce everyone present
  
• Ensure you know the child and parents’ names
• Establish objectives for the meeting
• Check the family’s understanding of the clinical situation

Introduce everyone present. It is crucial you know the child’s correct name, age and gender, and that you use these when referring to the child. It is also important you know the parents’ names and if possible, the names and ages of any siblings.

You can start by discussing the objectives for the meeting. This prepares the family for a potentially difficult conversation, and allows them to express their own aims before being overwhelmed by medical information.

Things you can say:

‘There are some things I need us to talk about in this meeting today that can be difficult to discuss, but I feel we need to. I also want to make sure we cover any questions you have. What would be helpful for us to talk about, from your perspective?’

Using open questions helps build rapport, and it can be a useful way to find out about the family’s understanding of the child’s clinical condition.

Things you can say:

‘I understand that (child) has been seriously ill. I have been updated and I have read through all the notes and test results but can you tell me in your own words what has been happening and how you understand things at the moment?’

‘Looking back over the last six months, what have you noticed?’ ‘What is your understanding of what is ahead for (child)?’

‘Would it be helpful to talk about how (child’s) illness may affect them in the months and years ahead?’

‘As you think about what is ahead for (child), what would you like to talk about with me? What information can I give you that would be helpful to you?’